Unlocking the Voice You Need to Level Up Your Leadership
/If you pause for a moment and listen, do you hear it? That strong, capable inner voice that has the ideas, opinions and answers your company would benefit from hearing, but it’s in competition with another inner voice, one that doesn’t speak up for fear of making a mistake and embarrassing ourselves. Or perhaps we feel psychologically unsafe and uncomfortable taking a risk and speaking up. While this isn’t an uncommon challenge, not using your voice can have consequences: you may be missing out on opportunities to demonstrate your value and level up in your leadership journey. Here are some ways I encourage the leaders I coach to find and use their voice:
Focus on the facts
Your brain can make up all kinds of stories to keep you questioning yourself but you can stop it in its tracks with facts. Write a list of at least 3 times you nailed a challenge as a leader — it could be making it through a tough deadline, navigating an interpersonal clash on your team or a sudden scope creep that you ironed out. Keep this list at the ready for anytime doubtful thoughts creep into your mind. As your wins grow, keep adding. Congrats, you’re creating your win journal! Looking at the successes you have already achieved can help you focus on reality rather than fear, and encourage you to keep reaching for the next challenge that is absolutely within your grasp.
Gather evidence of your amazingness
Reach out to a friend or colleague whose opinion you trust to ask them what they know you do well. You might be surprised by what they have to say, or it may reinforce a strength you’re proud of. Either way, this external insight can help provide you with the ammunition your mind needs to start believing in all you bring to the table and acting on it.
Create confidence builders
Set a small goal each day to do something that will boost your confidence. The trick is to keep it small. Maybe it’s leaving an insightful comment on a LinkedIn post, challenging yourself to speak up at a meeting where you would normally stay silent or having a thoughtful one-on-one conversation with a team member. Setting up these small, achievable tasks, will help you start stacking up little wins where you use your voice and demonstrate the value your voice has to offer.
Imagine the worst and the best that could happen
There are some cases where sharing our knowledge and ideas can cause strife in our companies, especially if they’re counter to what other leaders are proposing. In these situations, it can be helpful to do a mental reality check — if I speak up, what’s the worst that could happen? I get fired? If I speak up, what’s the best that could happen? I get a promotion? Are either of these scenarios likely, or will I probably end up just fine somewhere in the middle? Taking a look at the most common consequences, both good and bad, can help you realign the chatter in your head with reality, and give you the boost to go for it.
Be your best advocate
Think about the ways you have helped others to be heard through your leadership journey, times when someone needed you on their side to get what they deserved. Now consider how you can show up for yourself, to support and advocate for what you need, with the same conviction and confidence. As you move up the leadership ladder, things can get lonelier and chances are you will be increasingly responsible for boosting yourself up. The sooner you start standing up for yourself, the more natural it will become for you as the stakes increase in your career.
Get cozier with conflict
A fear of conflict can frequently get in the way of conversations that need to be had. Avoiding uncomfortable conversations as a leader sets an unsavoury standard for your team, signalling to them that you’re not willing or able to speak up for unpopular but necessary decisions or challenging situations. Reframing “conflict” from an unwanted fight to a necessary process for change can help to defuse some of the tension and align all parties in a shared purpose — resolving the issue effectively. This isn’t always easy, especially when fear is influencing the voice in your head and driving anxious body responses. But it is a key leadership skill that can be developed and is well worth your time and attention as it will reap benefits for you down the road.
Be self-reliant
While it’s helpful to get insight and feedback from others as we develop our skills and perspective, we can’t control what they’re going to say or do. That puts a lot of power in the hands of others. Rather than leaning on others to deliver what you need, focus on what you can control and provide. Learn to give yourself the pep talks or energy boosts you need to get in the right mindset before using your voice. After speaking up, practice giving yourself constructive feedback without bullying yourself or sugar-coating mistakes. Cultivating this self-reliance will help you get the feedback and support you need when you need it, helping you become able to empower yourself on demand.
Practice your skills
Doing anything without trying it at least once decreases your chances of success. While you can’t rehearse every situation you’ll find yourself in, you can practice verbalizing your ideas, concerns, etc. in a safe space. Research shows that practice helps your brain improve neural pathways, meaning that when you test out your voice in advance you will be strengthening your ability to perform when it’s the real deal. This practice is invaluable at boosting your brain and your confidence at the same time.
Using your voice confidently won’t happen overnight, and like practicing anything thoughtfully, you’ll likely hit some bumps along the way, but the good news is that each time you speak up, you’re making it easier to do so again. Businesses need diverse perspectives and risk takers to be able to thrive — bottom line, they need your voice. And you need them to see you, to hear you and value you. To grow as a leader, you need to actively demonstrate what you bring to the table. So keep pushing yourself and see what happens around you. You might just end up right where you deserve to be.