Digging Deeper than Lifehacks for Lasting Change
/Lifehacks: well meaning, seemingly doable ways to solve every little thing. No doubt your social media feed and inbox are full of them. I know mine is. We’ve been conditioned into thinking that if we just get that one tool, that one tactic, it will fix what’s going on. But here’s the thing – hacks and tactics are typically quick fixes focused on addressing only one element of a larger issue. We tackle a symptom, but we neglect exploring the foundation (aka the heart of the problem), and ultimately, our solution is short-lived. Just like when we patch up a roof, it may stop the current leak but it’s still prone to future leaks.
So how do you make a built-to-last repair? The answer is simple, but not easy. We need to explore the full picture right down to the core of who we are: the thoughts, feelings and behaviours that are showing up in our way of being. And we ought to do it thoughtfully and carefully, which can happen through coaching with a trauma-informed lens. Here’s what I mean by that:
What is trauma-informed coaching?
This approach to the coach-client relationship recognizes that life experiences, from the banal to the traumatic, show up in all shapes and sizes and are packed away in our minds and bodies and shaping our future experiences. This is especially true as we continue processing the collective trauma of the pandemic and how it affected each of us. A trauma-informed coach holds space and meets their client wherever they are in their journey while understanding the role of the connection between our brains and bodies, our ability to self-regulate and our behavioural responses in creating positive change in our lives. Trauma-informed coaching is not therapy, though there is certainly overlap. Therapists actively treat trauma from a diagnostic, medical perspective. Trauma-informed coaches understand and support the way trauma shows up in our lives and approach it with a focus on the present and looking ahead to the future.
Embrace “sustainable” over “straightforward”
When we think about using simple, isolated hacks to fix the challenges we’re facing, it’s valuable to stop and consider the longevity of these solutions. Look at how often the same issue is arising over your lifetime. What is the likelihood that they’ll last? What patterns do you notice? If you’ve tried to solve the same challenges more than once it might be time to engage in a deeper exploration of what’s beneath them. Real, lasting change isn’t simple and it requires a strong foundation to thrive.
Get uncomfortable
One of the benefits of simple solutions is that you don’t have to push yourself to look at what is really going on underneath the surface. You can implement a small switch in one area of your personal or professional life without having to look critically at the larger fabric of who you really are. But if we don’t go deeper and explore these more complex levels of our being, transformation usually eludes us. And digging in like this, confronting truths we may want to deny, can be incredibly uncomfortable. Having a trauma-informed coach guide you through this process safely and productively is essential to moving forward rather than getting mired in the sticky parts of the process.
If not now, when?
It might be that you’ve succeeded with quick fixes until now, and it can be tempting to continue. But like those patches on a leaky roof, a storm or just the day to day wear and tear could be enough for those patches to fail and quickly, the roof becomes a critical and urgent issue. We see this in burnout, where unresolved stress has continued to a point where stress-fighting hacks have failed and the emotional and physical reserve has been fully depleted. There will always be reasons to put off a more in-depth solution as we prioritize the urgency of our professional and personal commitments over our own wellness. But if we allow ourselves to reach burnout and other complex states of dysregulation it’s significantly harder to repair.
I invite you to consider how a trauma-informed coaching approach could benefit your journey to ascend in your career, your personal life and more. Reach out to me, Crystal Henrickson, to discuss what you’re facing and explore whether a trauma-informed approach could help you create the meaningful and lasting change you’re seeking.